Sometimes I wonder if my life is worth the time, if the juice is worth the squeeze.

Sometimes I stare at the sky and question why its blue and why its called blue or who came up with the fucking word BLUE, but then I accept that I have no clue.

Sometimes I ponder my existence with unfocused persistence, sometimes I wonder if I am  a figment of someone else's imagination or if everyone else is a figment of mine.

Sometimes I wonder if god is there and if my sins are really forgiven with a prayer and if he, she or it is listening, and if it finds my thoughts at all interesting?

Sometimes I contemplate suicide and the consequences ( if any) if I took my life. I regress and try to turn my thoughts into more positive ones, but I cant seem to find any worth thinking about so I stop looking and accept that negativity is just easier.

Sometimes I feel like smashing my phone, quitting my job, ditching my car and running away to the woods, but I know I cant so I don't.

Sometimes I wish I could.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm crazy or if everyone else is crazy and if the people talking to themselves under a bridge are sane, but then I convince myself that I don't give a shit and its all the same.

Sometimes I wonder if there is a grand design that we are all apart of. I wonder if everything in the universe is the same energy emanating from one infinite source.

I wonder if me, the person reading this, animals, bugs, plants and all the creatures of the sea will one day understand each other, but then I say fuck it and forget it, besides if a dog could talk to me would I really find what it had to say interesting?

I think back to my ponders of gods care of humanity's problems and I cant help but think that he feels the same way about us that I do about the talking dog.